prex precis f. (usually plur.) [request , entreaty]; esp. [prayer to a god]; sometimes [a curse, execration].
I know I could be happy,
If I threw myself away,
But I turn and hide, deep down inside,
Let the pain subside another day,
Clinging to what I know, I am,
Clutching all that I have,
I’ll sear these signs into my flesh,
Catharsis, Anguish, and Distress,
Brand myself as though a dog,
Caddle to the slaughter,
Sacrifice to feed the hog,
His wife and his daughter,
Falling away inside my nothing,
Worlds I will create,
Waiting for a numbing,
Bitterness to overtake,
Stand in the cold long enough,
Frostbite no longer burns,
Fingers falling off? No, never
there at all, ashes kept in urns,
Pulled apart from all directions,
Tell me what is left?
Looking to and fro for confections,
Anything sweet to reach these lips,
Looking around, beautiful death,
Confronts at every turn,
Fearing life in all it’s breadth,
When will i ever learn?
Children playing Life,
More alive than me.
Does disdain come from pain,
Could I be set free?
Let them go, never know,
silent and alone,
isolation not quite choice,
Subconscious makes itself known,
Still breathing, raspy, shallow,
Answers still untold,
walking out amongst the gallows,
Ever growing cold.
One Comment
maybe you should just— start over.
isn’t college about cleaning the slate?
if you really believe what you believe
then you’ll find that again
but i mean, who’s to say that what you desire..eh desire gives
it a sinfull connotation
who’s to say that what you don’t yearn for (the thing to full the void inside of you)
isn’t in the places you don’t go.
im not saying give up yr beliefs, im a fan of people who retain them after seeing everything in this cruel world…
but i don’t think you’ve seen it all
and i think that if you have and still have those same beliefs than you are more of a person that i will ever phathom being.
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